We interrupt our regular programming for this special report…

David Blaine and the “Dive of Death”…

I didn’t get it.  Not a bit.  Not in a “Well, it could’ve been executed better, but I dig what they were trying to pull off” kinda way.  Just.  No.

Call me “unenlightened” but I’ve never really been amazed by Blaine’s stunts/performance art/magic stuff.  At best it seems like a self congratulatory way of demanding the world’s attention.  A guy living upside down (or in a fishtank, or an ice cube, or whatever) in the most media aware city on the planet seems a desperate bid for spectacle.  If it was merely a bid to prove endurance, than do it in your backyard.  At worst it seems to work to satisfy some kind of morbid fascination; the idea of watching another human being endure physical rigors for my personal enjoyment.  I’m entirely Abu Ghraib’d out and not interested.

But then there’s the two hour pre-hype itself.  Did anyone else feel as embarassed for John Saunders as I did? Granted, he’s getting paid so I shed no tears.  But to see a respected journalist trotted out to give the “event” a sense of legitimacy is sad.  What… was Geraldo not available?

I will admit the “street” magic always gets me.  But you can’t help but wonder what you are not really seeing. The forced perspective from the camera limits what the home viewer is able to see.  And don’t blame me if I’m not convinced of the observational powers of the winners Blaine randomly chooses to perform his “illusions” for.  Oh, and the toothless redneck is always a nice touch.  Don’t get to see that too much of him on primetime television unless he’s describing the tornado as sounding like a freight train.

And then the final “illusion”…  Jumping into a small puddle from 40+ feet in the air.  But wait… he’s harnessed to something…  and slowly stopping… and someone is yelling to pull him up…  and now he is floating away… WAIT…  Floating away is the trick?  Was the trick to see if you could make two hours of my life disappear without me noticing?

Okay, end of rant… Sorry you had to see that.  

We now return to our regularly scheduled programming.